There are times when I think that certain things in life are like going to a swimming pool in the spring, begging for a semblance of summer. The swimming pools, during these periods, are full and free during the week, cheap during the weekends. I spend hours every summer bathing in the collective juices of humanity, straining for physical superiority over the people I water wrestle with. I try to swim every day when the weather permits because its fun, and indoor pools just don’t do it for me. However I am digressing.

Firstly. Without loss of generality I will assume that most people, including myself usually find pool water to be cold upon entry. Secondly, I assume that there exists a continuum of methods for pool entry, the extremes of which lie in either throwing one’s self in whilst screaming ,”Geronimo!” and the slower method of careful insertion into the water. I further assume that the latter takes longer time to achieve than the former. That being said agents are faced with the difficult decision of choosing a method of pool entry which minimizes desired level of pain experienced at insertion, and the amount of time it takes to do it, thereby maximizing the level of “fun” experienced by a trip to the swimming pool. (Note: At this stage of my analysis I am still drawing the analogy exclusively to swimming pools).

I don’t know about you guys but I choose to throw myself in. It hurts like hell, but you get over it much faster, leaving you more time spent beating the living crap out of your buddies under water.