This is going to be another one of those discussions where I’m going to make rampant generalizations which are perpetually disproved, but nevertheless contain some measure of truth. Therefore before commencing I herby absolve myself from offending anyone, and any objections which anyone could raise against anything I might say. Citing single examples doesn’t prove me wrong.

Now that I have that out of the way, let us discuss the transgenderal friendship. Speaking from the masculine perspective there is absolutely no such friendship which has ever happened between a straight male and female, where at some point, usually near the beginning, the guy doesn’t have some sexual interest in the female in question. Following this early phase, the man has a decision. He either faces up to the fact that he actually wants to pursue a close friendly relationship with the female in question, or back-off and allow it to either wilt under the strains of time or other miscellaneous obligations. The former usually stems from the type of guy who continues to harbor some small hope that somehow, someway he will be rewarded with nookie for his unwavering willingness at friendship. Although it is not unheard of, this sort of story seldom concludes with nookie, and therefore most males should be advised that stepping into a friendship with a female, given this frame of mind, is more often than not a waste of time. I won’t even mention how lame it is to perpetuate a false interest in a girl strictly for fucking, when you know in advance that you will never fuck. Now I wouldn’t presume to say that this logic applies to all friendships. In this case I’m talking about the very close personal friendship which sometimes develop between man and woman. For women, such friendships are genderless. We men are perpetually blinded by boobies.

“We will never go out cause we’re such good friends!” Every male at some point in their lives, usually when they are quite young, will have heard those painful words. What many males don’t realize is that the phrase in “woman talk” essentially translates to, “I see you as genderless, and so we can never sleep together.” A man who allows himself to become castrated by his “friend” will hardly ever have sex with her. In many ways this is the fault of the man. See women like their men manly, and manliness seldom allows for traits such as, “understanding” or “empathy”. These are womanly traits to both men and women, and therefore do not fit in the archetype male which all women are seeking. Many males would become offended, even angry at the girl for rejecting him, when clearly he is the one at fault for putting himself in this situation.

Maintaining a masculine image is critical in any liaison where the man wishes to get sex from a member of the opposite sex. I will assume for simplicity that I am speaking of straight relationships since honestly I haven’t discussed the topic nearly enough with my gay friends in order to make any kind of generalizations on homosexuality, so lets stick to straight people since that’s who I know best. The unmanly man is not challenging to the woman who wants to fight for something special, nor is it biologically an appropriate choice since an unmanly man is less likely to produce good offspring. Women simply aren’t attracted to that. True our jaded mothers will try and preach to us about sensitivity and kindness, but a mama’s boy is not a manly boy, and won’t get laid.

That being said, I am not trying to discourage men from having close friendships with women. Friendships are all rewarding in their own way so long as they are seen as just that. Friendships. Keeping that in mind is important in order to not be a hypocrite. If you insist on trying to sleep with the girl you are beginning to become close to in a friendly context, my advice to you would be to back-off a bit and display some manly traits. Make sure you don’t lose your dick, by getting too close. You can do this without being an asshole, although being a bit of one is likely to help your chances. Find that balance which makes you interesting enough to pursue, but not revolting enough to push away, and you will strike gold. Otherwise give in to the fact that you won’t fuck the chick, and take the friendship for all it’s worth. One thing to keep in mind though is that if you reveal too many vulnerabilities to this person, she will likely castrate you to her friends as well so be careful about becoming too close if you are thinking about banging one of her girlfriends. On the other hand don’t be a total dick or you will be branded as an asshole before you even have a chance to prove how big of one you really are. As with all things, balance is the key.